Dear Full-Time Working Mom,
I see you there. You are the one arriving to work 30 seconds before you’re considered late. You got your baby dressed, fed and dropped off at Day Care well before you’ve even brushed your own teeth and hair. Before you leave home, you make sure that you have everything with. You fear forgetting anything and having to return home and being late for work. Then the day comes when you forget your office key, lunch or even your child’s diaper bag and now you have to return home and explain to your boss why you’re late. There are days where you’ve only had 2-4 hours of sleep…continuously. Sometimes your pants are a little wrinkled or you arrive with baby spit-up on your shirt. Go figure.
You nervously check your cell-phone during the meeting because your little one has been sick. You pray that daycare won’t call you to pick her up because you have no more sick days and you dread asking your boss to leave early. Someone asks you to go out to lunch, but you pass because you have to go buy medicine, diapers and any other baby items that are needed. I see you sleeping in your car instead of having lunch because the previous night your baby decided to stay up. When others are staying late at work finish that big audit or trying to get ahead for tomorrow, you are rushing out the door because instead of going home, you’re actually going to your second job in order to make ends meet.
You count the hours in order have her back in your arms. You feel like everyone else is doing better at their job than you. When you are at work you feel guilty that you aren’t with her. When you are at home you are distracted with what you didn’t finish up at work that day. If you had to evaluate yourself, you’d say that you’re an okay Mom and employee. Definitely not exceptional at either though. You are always torn between your motivated, intellectual, business-self and your loving, nurturing mom-self.
It’s 11:30 pm and you realize that you haven’t showered and that the dishes are all piled up on the sink. You’re debating about whether you should shower and leave the dishes for tomorrow or vise versa. You see those pictures of your stay -at- home friends and while you know that they too are going through their own struggles, you can’t help but feel a bit jealous. Jealous at the fact that they get to stay home and spend time with their baby. You secretly feel left out when you see their Facebook posts about play dates at the newest indoor-play venue and you worry that your kids are missing out on having a close group of friends to play with. On the flip side, you come across a group of other moms, who make you feel utter crap because you’re a working mom. You try to ignore the ugly thoughts that people think you’re a bad mom and value your career more than your kids.
But then certain things make your days that much brighter.
Like the fact that you’re baby is now rolling over or that they can sit up. When you just can’t catch a break, your baby looks at you and with one smile, makes it all go away. At work, your friends bring over a pair of matching socks (for you and the baby) or a cup of coffee because they know of the rough night you had. You get to accomplish your To Do List and have lunch. You finally get to watch your guilty pleasure shows or work on your blog & YouTube Channel. You even to shower on time!
Being a working mom is certainly no walk in the park. Being a MOM in general is not easy. Period. Working does not make you less of a mom. Being a mom doesn’t make you a weaker employee. If you are working because your family depends on it financially, I applaud you. If you work because you love what you do or it’s simply who you are, be proud of what you are accomplishing.
At the end of the day, it is good to remember and repeat:
I am good at my job. I am a good mom. I’ve got this. WE ALL GOT THIS.